One of the quirks of modern award campaigns is how they can sometimes outlast the production itself. I recall a conversation I had in 2010 with Mark Ruffalo during the long awards season for The Kids Are All Right, where he remarked, somewhat in disbelief, “Kyle, I spent just six days on this movie.”

Kieran Culkin Could Rule Oscar Season. He’d Rather Be at Home.

Nonetheless, many actors are eager to spend months promoting their films in Los Angeles. For Ruffalo, it paid off, as both he and the film received Oscar nominations. Recently, I’ve been seeing quite a bit of Kieran Culkin, who’s considered the frontrunner for Best Supporting Actor for A Real Pain. In his efforts to promote the film, Culkin attended an intimate dinner with critics at Spago, worked the room at the star-studded Governors Awards, and met with me for coffee at the Sunset Tower bar in West Hollywood.https://wordpress.com/

Culkin, naturally charming, clever, and talkative, seems to thrive in these promotional settings—traits that served him well during his Emmy-winning role on HBO’s Succession, which wrapped up last spring. Yet, when I met him at 42, he was feeling the strain: his current press tour meant missing a parent-teacher conference back home in New York.

“My wife said, ‘We can do it over Zoom,’ and I said, ‘No, no, let’s do it the right way, when they scheduled it. Go ahead,’” he explained. “I want to be the kind of person who can do my job and also be there for my kids. But I’m learning I can’t always be home for everything.”

Family is clearly important to Culkin. Raised in New York with his seven siblings (including his famous brother, Macaulay Culkin of Home Alone), Culkin now lives in the city with his wife, Jazz Charton, and their two children. He admits that when the filming schedule for A Real Pain shifted, he nearly withdrew because the new dates meant he would only see his family briefly at the start of the Poland shoot, leaving him without them for nearly a month.

“I couldn’t be away from them that long,” he said. “I had a complete meltdown.”

It was a good thing he stayed, as it’s hard to imagine A Real Pain without him. The film, written and directed by Jesse Eisenberg, features Culkin as Benji, a cousin who embarks on a trip to Poland with his estranged relative, played by Eisenberg, to learn more about their late grandmother. Benji, who has never been particularly stable emotionally, is charismatic yet unpredictable—he could light up a room or drain it entirely. Culkin’s performance captures these mood swings with both authenticity and surprise.

To achieve this spontaneity, Culkin explained, required more improvisation than Eisenberg had initially planned. Below are edited highlights from our conversation.

How did you feel about A Real Pain when you first read the script?

I was laughing out loud, which doesn’t happen often. It was such a tight, clever script that I didn’t feel like I needed to do much prep. There were no gaps I needed to fill in. I just wanted to show up and not rehearse, not overthink it because the character was meant to be spontaneous. I didn’t say my lines aloud until we were actually shooting.

You never rehearsed your lines?

Not once. I wouldn’t even look over the scenes the night before or in the morning. On the way to set, I’d ask, “What scene are we doing? Great.” I’d memorize the lines quickly in my head, and then do the scene. I’d be like, “Oh, so that’s what happens?” But it worked for this character. I can’t do that with every role.

Didn’t you have a more conventional approach before, like in theater?

Yeah, in theater I was more about sticking to the script. But after working on Succession, I felt like I had a sense of ownership over my character, Roman Roy, who could talk his way out of or into anything. With him, I started learning lines quickly and trying something new. In one take, I didn’t respond at all to Nicholas Braun’s character and just started drying my hands with his shirt. It felt great, and they kept it in the final cut.

Did you see acting as play before Succession?

Maybe when I was younger. I remember my wife making fun of me ten years ago. I said, “I’m stressed, I have to go to work,” and she laughed, saying, “Work? I’m going to an office, you’re going to pretend to be someone. It’s called ‘play.’”

How would your performance in A Real Pain have been different if you had approached it before Succession?

It would have been a lot more rigid. I’d probably have been frustrated by things like T marks on the floor. On Succession, we didn’t have marks, we just acted. Jesse and I found a rhythm for A Real Pain, but it took time to figure out how to work together.

You’ve said you do your best work when you can break some rules. Do you worry about being seen as a difficult actor?

I’m aware of that. But I think the best way to find the right balance is by working with actors who are open to it. On Succession, we had a great rapport, and I never felt like the difficult one.

In A Real Pain, your main scene partner is Jesse, who also wrote and directed the film. How does that change the dynamic?

It was tough at first. As an actor, you’re not supposed to give notes to your fellow actors, but Jesse would do that. At first, I was defensive—literally clenching my fists, thinking, “Who is this guy telling me how to do it?” But he knew what the scene needed, and it worked. It was a great collaboration.

How do you feel about directors who try to create tension between actors?

It’s frustrating because it’s unnecessary. You don’t need to manufacture conflict. Actors are perfectly capable of creating tension on their own. For example, Sarah Snook and Matthew Macfadyen in Succession have such intense on-screen chemistry as Shiv and Tom, even though off-screen, they are lovely people and great friends. Tension should come naturally.

Did you take A Real Pain because you were planning your post-Succession career?

No, I don’t think that way. During the final season of Succession, it wasn’t even certain it would be the last season. Jesse kept everyone guessing until the table read of the final episode.

How did you feel when Succession ended?

When the finale aired, I was in Poland, so I couldn’t watch it live. I watched seven episodes before I left for Poland, but then the finale slipped by, and I still haven’t seen it.

Do you think you’ll watch it eventually?

Maybe, but it’s hard to prioritize it over other things. We’re always so busy, and when we do watch TV, it has to be something we both agree on. We’ve got a stack of shows waiting for us.

You’ve been off set since A Real Pain finished. Some actors get antsy if they’re not jumping straight into a new project.

That seems strange to me. I’ve also heard actors get upset if their movie doesn’t do well, and I don’t get that either. My job is to show up and do my best work; how it’s received doesn’t affect me.

You’ve said that success isn’t important to you.

If you’re focused on your star image, then you’re not in it for the right reasons. I think most successful actors are passionate about the craft itself. Fame isn’t the goal—doing great work is.

Does growing up around your brother Macaulay’s fame shape your perspective on it?

Probably. I’ve seen firsthand how fame can negatively impact people. It’s a hard adjustment for those who become famous overnight. Fame may seem appealing at first, but it can make your life smaller, not bigger.

You seem to prioritize family over work.

Absolutely. I was in Warsaw recently and asked for one less day of press so I could go home for 32 hours. I was sick the entire time, but I just needed to see my kids. Work is for supporting my family, not the other way around.

Do you consider yourself ambitious?

Not in the traditional sense. I aim high in my personal life—I’m married to the most wonderful person, and I work hard at being the best father I can be. That’s my real ambition.

So, accolades from your career don’t define you?

No. They’re nice, but the real rewards are at home, reading stories to my kids and singing them to sleep. Everything else is just a means to that end.